Most recent edit on 2007-03-27 22:48:52 by IceBound [Minor.]
Additions:
Aftercare has many facets which need to completed. Depending on the intensity of your play the submissive may be physically exhausted and need a certain degree of physical care - you need to ensure that all substances are accounted for - make sure they're not suffering, or going to suffer from dehydration, make sure all their wounds are tended to in a caring and tender manner, make sure your sub eats properly! Above all make sure they care for themselves! Don't just do this in the hour after your scene, try and see them frequently over the next three / four days, just your presence will have one hell of a helping hand in keeping them stable.
Deletions:
Aftercare has many facets which needs to completed. Depending on the intensity of your play the submissive may be physically exhausted and need a certain degree of physical care - you need to ensure that all substances are accounted for - make sure they're not suffering, or going to suffer from dehydration, make sure all their wounds are tended to in a caring and tender manner, make sure your sub eats properly! Above all make sure they're care for themselves! Don't just do this in the hour after your scene, try and see them frequently over the next three / four days, just your presence will have one hell of a helping hand in keeping them stable.
Edited on 2007-03-24 10:23:19 by IceBound [Added Steel Door Article Link.]
Additions:
External Link: There is an interesting and in-depth article on SubDrop aka Sub Rebound over at Steel Door - click here to read
Oldest known version of this page was edited on 2007-03-24 08:53:36 by IceBound []
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Sub Drop
- If you're a experienced submissive, you'll know instantly what I'm talking about here.
- If you're a submissive who had their last scene about three days ago you'll be sitting there with a wry smile on your face.
- If you're a submissive who has always wondered the fact that you tend to do an emotional nose-dive a few days after a scene and didn't know why, then keep reading...
- Dom? Please scroll down and read, then send your sub(s) here, please, it'll make 'em feel better!
Definition: SubDrop is the emotional drop that submissives feel at some point shortly after their last scene with their dominant.
Time Frame: A few hours to a few days... Experience of talking to different subs leads me to believe an average of three days.
Good News: It doesn't last forever!!!
A more in-depth explanation
When a sub enters a scene there is a lifting of the spirits, for the duration of that scene the sub feels owned, they feel that they've given themselves, bared their soul to the dom, and
nothing on this planet is better.
SubSpace is a high of incredible strength and intensity, and lack of it is just awful. Lack of
SubSpace is what
SubDrop is, it can hit different submissives in different ways and at different times, for some it is purely an emotional condition such as likened to depression and feelings of helplessness, for others it can hit them physically, they can actually feel sick.
In line with the emotional impact after a scene there are also the physical reasons - depending on the scene there are chemicals drifting around the submissive's body, namely endorphins and adrenaline - these are both very powerful chemicals and their withdrawal may be likened to coming off a drug-induced high.
When it hits a submissive badly enough they can be completely lost for the duration of the Drop, having random outbursts of tears, and bouts of severe withdrawal. One of the important things to remember about
SubDrop is that it is entirely subjective - Submissives are individuals and will all react differently to the lack of
SubSpace and the general come-down from the scene-high.
One important word
AFTERCARE.
If you're a dom and truly care about your sub, you'll give them lots and lots of aftercare whenever possible. Remember for many submissives out there, their dom will be the center of their world and after a scene if the dom isn't around to give aftercare for whatever reason it'll just hurt your sub, and not in the kinky way either!
Aftercare has many facets which needs to completed. Depending on the intensity of your play the submissive may be physically exhausted and need a certain degree of physical care - you need to ensure that all substances are accounted for - make sure they're not suffering, or going to suffer from dehydration, make sure all their wounds are tended to in a caring and tender manner, make sure your sub eats properly! Above all make sure they're care for themselves! Don't just do this in the hour after your scene, try and see them frequently over the next three / four days, just your presence will have one hell of a helping hand in keeping them stable.
The non-physical aspect of aftercare come mainly in having contact with the dom and lots of hugs, plus comfort type activities (Chocolate, curling up in-front of the fire with lots of hugs on tap)... If at all possible, don't leave the submissive alone for long periods of time. Do leave them their privacy though, a certain amount of withdrawal and reflection on the scene is needed and shouldn't be stopped.
A warning to those out there who see the submissive glowing immediately after a scene and think "rubbish",
SubDrop won't have hit at that moment, so just wait, remember it can take a few days to hit.
There are a few rare individuals out there, mainly switches, or very casual players, who never experience
SubDrop - if you're one of those people - lucky lucky you!
Speaking from a purely subjective and personal stance - having the dom lock something on me such as an ankle chain or collar (If reality allows it!) is tremendously comforting and helps no end to combat my feelings of
SubDrop after a scene or a weekend of beatings and bondage. Being in contact with my dom afterwards is important as it allows me to verify and validate my feelings on the scene, and my feelings towards the dom. A note here - I'm purely a sub, I don't even switch, so this article is completely written with the submissive in mind. Subs - keep your (I'm sure I don't need to say this!) dom's feelings in your mind also!
CategoryExperiences -
CategorySafety
